what i pretend to be

for anyone ▲ 405 words ▲ yaay

Hikari despised homework.

And, well, okay, no one really liked homework. Well, at least, not normal people. And by no means did Hikari claim to be normal. Oh, no, she knew she was strange. She was perfectly okay with it, too. After all, no one would want to be normal, now would they? But back to homework. And it wasn't like she hated all homework. Some of her teachers made it fun - she had definitely enjoyed her photography homework (taking abstract pictures), and loved researching mythology for her other classes. Hikari was the type who liked reading, and she enjoyed writing papers. Yes, she was a dork. But, again, she was okay with that. Because she was a fun dork, and she was damn proud of who she was.

But this? This was crap. Hikari pushed back from the paper in disgust, folding her arms across her chest, glaring at the paper. Normally, Hikari loved her psychology class. It was interesting, engaging, and a whole lot of fun. It was easily one of her favourite classes. But right now she was rethinking that ranking. Her professor had given them all a research paper - something she honestly didn't mind - but it was the topic that was irritating her. The brunette girl picked up the paper, re-reading the heading once again. Describe one thing that you fear the most, and give an explanation for it. Analyze how it has affected your life and what you can do to start solving it. Hikari wished they were still talking about Freud - this was so much worse than a sex-starved raving lunatic.

There were very few things that Hikari was truly afraid of. Unlike most teenagers, she did fear humiliation, or self-consciousness. No, Hikari honestly didn't give a rat's ass what others thought about her. Only the people she cared about mattered, and that's how it should be. She didn't fear heights, since she had flown all over the world. She feared odder things, at least to others. Bleeding. But when you could bleed to death from a paper cut, you’d be afraid of that too, right? And singing. To be honest, it wasn’t singing itself she was afraid of. But singing in front of others. To this day, only Kythen knew that she even knew how to sing – not even her mother did. She didn’t want to share that piece of her for fear it would becoming meaningless. And nothingness, meaningless, was worse than anything. At least to the curly haired girl.

Hikari really didn't want to explain any of those to the teacher. She sighed again, closing her eyes. She was lying outside on the lawn of her school, though she knew that she should probably should get inside, seeing as it was getting later in the day. Even the day seemed to echo her mood - thunder rumbled in the distance, and lightning crackled. The chocolate eyed girl closed her eyes. "This day sucks." she muttered. "I wanna go back to bed..."

for anyone ▲ 405 words ▲ yaay

From the time she was little, she was told over and over that she was different. That she wasn’t like the other children. That she was inherently flawed and as such, needed to be kept away. It was something often told by parents, but it had never been in a loving way. Limit upon limit had been placed upon her, restrictions to keep her safe. Because that’s all her parents ever wanted her to be – safe. It wasn’t a bad goal, or even wrong. But there was a big difference between being safe and being happy. Safety was being locked in doors all day, staring wistfully out windows, wondering what it was like to be just like everyone else. To be normal. Because she didn’t want to be different. She didn’t want to be unusual. She didn’t want to be other than Hikari Kaoru Mikhals, magic wielding werewolf who loved music. A girl who longed to just be herself. Who didn’t have to hide. Where here flaws were damning,

Hikari watched and listened. And she saw. She saw the things that others tried to hide. It wasn’t that she tried. Because she didn’t. But Hikari was honest, especially with herself. She didn’t claim to understand such big concepts such as love, hate, sadness, happiness. No, she doubted that anyone could truly understand it. She didn’t understand why she was around this boy she felt as if nothing could touch her. As if she was both tethered to the ground and weightless at the same time, as if she was flying. And for a girl who had spent many a night staring up at the stars, dreaming of a way to get out there… that was amazing. It was intoxicating. It was terrifying. She loved him, this she knew, and had told him so. Why would she hide such a thing? But the bond ran stronger than she ever imagined, the childhood friend of hers whom she had adored as a child. But she saw.

Sometimes she didn’t want to.

Thunder rolling overhead, along with a new scent, brought her out of her doom and gloom. The boy looked to be a bit younger than she was, and absolutely adorable. She smiled a bit, not even fazed as lightning lit up the sky. The Japanese girl had always loved storms, especially since she didn’t get to see many when she was living back at Dallas. Her magic didn’t extend to the weather, although sometimes she wished, but it didn’t mean she liked them any less. ”It’s beautiful.” She agreed, picking up her papers and books, standing easily to her feet. She smiled at him. ”You gonna end up dancing in the rain, or would you like to join me under the gazebo?” She asked, tilting her head to one side.

for anyone ▲ 405 words ▲ yaay

Chocolate eyes gazed up at the stormy sky with thoughtfulness. Back home in Japan, a storm was seen as a blessing. The sea, the wind, the rain… everything was hanging in a delicate balance. Water was an unusually strong element, one that could take you by surprise. It could be calm, flowing, just a trickle, the thing that gave life. But in an instant, it could change, becoming fierce, harsh, unbending and could take life away in an instant. The island people of Japan knew that well, coming to respect and in some parts worship the sea and rain. It was different here, of course. The States differed from her homeland so much so that she often didn’t recognize anything. There were days, like today, where she missed home, longed for the cherry blossoms and tea of her home.

Time goes by, nothing ever stays the same, though.

Shaking the thoughts out of her head, Hikari turned to the young man with a friendly smile. He wasn’t a Wolf, she could scent that in an instant. It was so interesting going to this school and seeing all the different people and species. She had grown up around Wolves all her life, so she more or less thought they were pretty boring. She knew what wolves could do. She wanted to see what others could do. She really didn’t have an opinion on the humans – after all, she was human enough as it was, she really couldn’t see why there’d be a difference now. The boy in front of her smelled like magic, so she hazard a guess that he had to be a either a fae or some kind of wizard. That was interesting! She let out her sing song laugh as she got to her feet, far too graceful for a human.

”Have you ever seen the sea when it storms? It is the most amazing sight, something people back home are blessed to see.” Hikari said, dusting off her pants, her slightly accented voice louder to be heard over the wind. She led the way to the gazebo, not wanting to get soaked and get scolded by Ky again to take care of herself, brushing back strands of black hair away from her face. ”So I am guessing you like storms? You should travel to Japan, then. The storms there… these ones hardly compare.” She informed him with a light shrug.

Realizing she was being slightly rude and not introducing herself, she hastened to correct the error. She held out her hand with a smile. ”My name is Hikari, by the way. Hikari Mikhals. I am a sophomore here.”

for anyone ▲ 405 words ▲ yaay

The young woman sniffed the air slightly, her head tilting to the side, a wolfish gesture that stuck with her even in human form. ”Smells like rain… and water.” She mused, brown eyes gentle. Hikari wasn’t ashamed to admit that she spent as much time in her wolf form as possible. She loved the graceful danger that came with transforming into her red furred wolf form. She had gotten control over her Wolf form early on in life, much to her parents’ relief. They had gotten a wee bit tired of her just randomly turning into a wolf and destroying her clothes. It wasn’t as bad as her randomly setting things on fire or summoning ghosts in her bedroom, but it was enough for her parents to get exasperated with her often. Okay, she hadn’t meant to set the curtains on fire and bolt in her wolf form, in her defense. It had been an accident. Running away? Maybe not smart, but not her fault.

Living in Texas had been an eye opener for her. Back in Japan, the Wolves were stuffy and rarely ever transformed on a whim. Here in Texas… she remembered many fond nights running with her best friend Kythen in their wolf forms. Along with practicing their magic. Her eyes grew fond as she remembered the time where she and Ky had snuck into a graveyard to summon ghosts. Perhaps not her best idea because ghosts really didn’t enjoy being bothered, but it had been a learning experience, that was for sure. She doubted she’d ever repeat it, though. Shuddering at the thought, she turned her attention to the human standing next to her, giving him a welcoming smile. Most people here had this thing against humans, of which she really didn’t understand. They were funny creatures, she thought, even if a bit fragile.

But he smelled of magic.

”They’re beautiful too. Especially if you can find the eye of the storm.” The Wolf said, reminded of the hurricane in Japan. She stuck her hands in her back pockets, leaning up against one of the pillars, watching the rain pour down. ”I hope so. My homeland is amazing.” She grinned. ”Not that I’m biased or anything.” Of course she was – Hikari loved Japan deeply. Not that she didn’t love America, because she certain did. But there was no place like home, right? Right.

”Nice to meet you, Mason-kun!” Hikari tacked on the honorific with a smile, an automatic habit now. Only Ky escaped the Japanese politeness that had been drilled into her, and that had only been after years of bugging and pleading. ”You smell of magic.” Tact wasn’t exactly her forte, and she really wanted to know what he was, even if that was rather impolite.